


Zombie

by vampsvngs



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Angst, Death, Depression, Funeral, Heavy Angst, Kind of Based Off Zombie but Not Really, Losing Someone, Losing a friend, Other, Suicide, Twigger Warning in Notes, major angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:46:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27927727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vampsvngs/pseuds/vampsvngs
Summary: Jae & Younghyun were friends since childhood but this doesn’t last forever.
Relationships: None
Kudos: 7





	Zombie

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE READ !!
> 
> TW // HEAVY MENTIONS OF DEPRESSION & SUICIDE HAPPENS
> 
> I am no way trying to glorify suicide or anything like that. Please, please, please, read at you own risk & be careful!!
> 
> If you have a friend feeling down, please help them out as much as you can!

Jae hasn’t really felt the same since  _ that  _ day, it’s been years but it’s still fresh in his mind. Ever since then, he hasn’t been able to smile or laugh. Everyday, since  _ that _ day, has been a living hell. It’s been hard for him to leave his shared apartment, it’s been hard to step out of his room, it has been  _ very  _ hard to find happiness in anything that he’s done since  _ that  _ day.

Jae doesn’t know how long he has been looking down at the bottle of pills, on his bathroom sink. He’s supposed to take two a day, six hours apart. That’s simple enough, though, he didn’t  _ want  _ to take two, he really didn’t want to take them at all. He  _ knows  _ they aren’t helping him, the damn depression pills. Bringing his fucking  _ best friend _ back would help, not these stupid pills.

Tears quickly swell up in his eyes, running down his cheeks. His grip on the sink tightens and he doubles over, crying. It hurts so much, losing someone so close to him.

His sobs get louder and it starts to get hard to breathe. “S-Sungjin!” he tries to yell out between sobs. “Sungjin, pl-please come here!” His voice comes out broken, cracking some.

Seconds later, Sungjin comes running into the bathroom, “What is it? What’s wrong?”

“I-It hurts,” he sobs out, “It hurts s-so much.”

Sungjin looks at the older, sadness in his eyes. “I know, Jae, I know. Do you need anything?”

Jae looks at the younger, tears still streaming down his cheeks, making it hard for him to see. “J-Just, you? To be in here?” he says, voice coming out small.

“Of course, I’m here. Let’s sit, okay?” he says, closing the door behind him. The two of them sit down on the floor, small hiccups escape Jae’s lips. He tries hard to keep the sobs from being loud.

“C-Can I hold your hand?” Jae asks, looking at the male in front of him.

Sungjin smiles softly, “Of course you can.” It stays silent for a few, well not completely. Jae’s hiccups make some noise. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Jae’s hand tightens around Sungjin’s. “I miss him so much,” he whispers, his voice breaks at the end.

“I know, I do too.”

“It’s j-just… if only I got home a few minutes early, he’d still  _ be  _ here. We’d still live in our apartment, still going to Dowoon’s garage, making music every weekend, still going out to get c-coffee on Friday’s. We could have gotten him help. If only I was earlier, I shouldn’t h-have gone to the gas station. I-I should have w-went straight home. It’s all m-my fault, S-Sungjin. He’s gone because of  _ me _ ,” Jae cries out, his grip around Sungjin’s hand tightening more.

Sungjin frowns at the older. “Jae, it was  _ not  _ your fault, okay? You didn’t kn-”

“B-But I  _ should _ have!” Jae yells, cutting off Sungjin. “I should have  _ known _ . H-He was my best friend, I should have helped him.”

Sungjin’s frown deepens. He brings Jae closer, hugging him. “You didn’t know, bub. You tried  _ everything _ you could, okay? It’s not your fault.” Jae just stays quiet, not believing the other.

The eldest of the two calms down minutes later and they both eventually move to Jae’s room. Sungjin, of course, makes sure Jae takes his medication before he leaves the others room. Sungjin told him he’d check on him every other hour, which Jae doesn’t mind much.

Once Sungjin is completely out of his room, Jae lays back, staring at the ceiling. He’s waiting for his meds to kick in, they’ll knock him so he can take a few hour nap. He feels like he desperately needs one. For Jae, it’s a bit hard to go to sleep without his meds. Without them, he would be up for hours, with his thoughts. He definitely doesn’t want that.

Jae can tell when his medication starts to kick in, his eyelids start to feel heavy. Slowly, his eyes began to flutter shut and he goes to sleep.

  
  
  


———

  
  
  


_ four years ago _

  
  


Jae sits down on the first seat of the bus, sitting his bags on the seat beside his. He checks the time, “Okay, I won’t be out too late now,” he mutters to himself. “Should I make sure I got everything?” he then questions.

He grabs the bags and looks through them. “Shit, the napkins. Brian needed them.” Jae pulls on the string, signaling that he needs to get off. The bus comes to a slow stop and he gets off, he makes sure to thank the driver on his way out.

The tall male goes to the nearest gas station and walks in. He’s familiar with this gas station, him and Wonpil has been in here for cheap coffee before and it’s only eight minutes away from his and Brian’s apartment building, perfect.

Jae grabs a pack of napkins and then goes to pay for them. Seconds later, he leaves the gas station and starts to head home, which doesn’t take him long to get to. He puts the pin in for his and Brian’s apartment and the building's front door clicks open. He makes his way to the elevator and clicks the button then goes inside. Once in, he hits the five button and the door closes shut, taking him up to that floor.

He walks out of the elevator once it stops and heads towards his apartment door. He checks to see if Brian had locked the door or not, which he did. Jae takes his key out and unlocks the door, walking into his shared home.

The first thing he notices is that it’s quiet, which isn’t anything new. He knows the younger male likes to take small naps throughout the day, which he thinks is going on.

Jae takes his coat off, hanging it on the coat rack, and then slips his shoes off, placing them nicely by the door. He then goes into the kitchen, setting the bags on the counter. “I need to go wake Brian up,” Jae says to himself softly. 

He makes his way to the others room, knocking on the door lightly. “Hey dude, wake up. I’ll be starting dinner soon.” There’s no movement after a minute, making Jae let out a sigh. “I’m coming in.”

Slowly, Jae opens the door, peeking inside. He notices Brian laying there, sleeping. He opens the door all the way, walking over to Brian’s bed.

He lightly shakes the younger, “Wake up Bri.” This doesn’t work so he starts to shake him a bit harder. His elbow hits something on the nightstand, knocking it over. He turns around, picking it up.

  
  


_ “Sleeping pills: Take 2 before sleeping.” _

  
  


Jae notices that it’s completely empty. It was definitely full earlier…

His eyes widen and the pill bottle slips out of his hand. “No no no,” Jae says, panic filling his body. He slowly looks behind him, at Brian’s body. He notices how his best friend  _ isn’t  _ breathing. He turns around fully, beginning to shake the younger again. “Bri, Bri, wake up, please, get up,” he yells.

He stops shaking him, and pulls away fully, he knows shaking isn’t going to work. He takes two of his fingers and checks his pulse.

His heart sinks to his stomach. “Oh my god.”

Jae’s hands start to shake and tears form in his eyes. He quickly takes his phone out, dialing an emergency number.

_ “Thank you for calling, what’s your emergency?” _

“H-Hello? Uh, my friend isn’t breathing, I-I think he took a whole b-bottle of sleeping pills, I can’t g-get him to wake up.  _ Please _ h-help me,” he says, voice shaking and breaking.

_ “You said he isn’t breathing? Give me your address and we will send medics immediately.” _ Jae tells the lady his address, crying while doing so.  _ “They should be there in twenty minutes.” _

“O-Okay, thank you.” Then he hangs up.

Jae checks Brian’s breathing and pulse again, his eyes filling up with more tears. Jae gently climbs on to the bed, getting behind Brian. He pulls the younger males body closer to him, a sob escaping his lips. He places his head on top of Brian’s, another sob leaving his lips. He rocks their bodies back and forth.

“Why B-Bri? Why’d you do it?” he whispers, he knows the younger can’t hear him. “W-We could have gotten you help, all of u-us could, you know? You were doing s-so well, bub.”

Medics come minutes later, having a hard time getting Jae away from the body. A few of the medics frown and look at Jae with sadness, his sobs breaking their hearts. They have to pull him out of the room and outside.

“You don’t need to be around that pal, it’s for your own good,” one says as they take Jae outside of the building. He only nods his head.

  
  


The next two hours are a bit of a blur to him. Brian was announced dead and Jae was asked about a million questions about the younger male and who he was to Jae. They asked for phone numbers of family and friends, which he had only given them Brian’s parents numbers. Jae, himself, will tell his friends. Plus, he didn't want to be there when Brian’s parents came, he couldn’t deal with it, it’d hurt him even more than finding Brian.

Jae ends up waving down a taxi and taking it to Sungjin and Wonpil’s place. He takes his phone out while in the taxi, pulling up Dowoon’s contact.

After three rings, the younger answers.  _ “Hello?”  _ Dowoon’s deep voice fills Jae’s ear.

“H-Hey, meet me at Sungjin and Pillie’s place,  _ please _ ?”

_ “Yeah, sure. What’s wrong? Are you okay?” _ Dowoon asks, his voice filled with worry.

“Just meet me there, okay?” Then he quickly hangs up.

The taxi drops him off at his friends apartment building, he pays and the car drives off. He walks up to the door and goes into the building. It doesn’t take him long to get up to their apartment. Jae hesitantly knocks on the door.

Wonpil opens the door, smiling when he sees Jae. “Oh! Hey, hyung! What are you doing at this hour and where’s Younghyun hyung?”

Once Jae’s eyes lock with Wonpil’s, his eyes fill with tears again and pull the younger into a hug. A loud sob leaves Jae’s lips, making Sungjin walk into the living room, concern written on his face.

“What’s going on?” he asks the two.

“I-I don’t know, we locked eyes and he started crying.”

Sungjin walks over, placing a hand on Jae’s back. “What’s wrong, bub?”

Jae looks at Sungjin, “Brian, h-he… he killed himself.”

Wonpil tightens his arms around Jae. “What?” he questions, his voice coming out in a whisper. Sungjin looks at Jae with widened eyes.

“Hey guy’s! Jae told me to co — what’s going on?” Dowoon asks when he walks inside and sees the two that own the apartment close to tears and hears a sobbing Jae. “What’s wrong with Jae hyung?”

“I- uh, Younghyun, he-” Sungjin cuts himself, not being able to finish his sentence.

Dowoon’s bag slips out of his hand. “Did he… did he do i-it? Did he uh..” his voice trails off, turning into a whisper. Sungjin slowly nods his head, motioning the youngest to come closer. Dowoon does, hugging the elder as tears threaten to spill.

It takes a while for them all to calm down. Once they do, Sungjin asks Jae to explain what happened, which Jae does. After explaining, and some more crying, Wonpil offers Jae to stay the night, not wanting the older to go back to his home. Jae, of course, accepts this and asks if Dowoon can stay too, Sungjin and Wonpil agree to this. So the rest of the night, they spend it trying  _ really  _ hard to distract themselves from what has happened and watch movies and play games.

  
  
  


———

  
  
  


_ present day _

  
  


Jae wakes up, gasping. He hasn’t had a dream about  _ that  _ day for a few months now, he was hoping to never dream of it again. It always plays out like a movie… he wishes it was.

He sighs as he sits up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he does so. He gets up and goes to his closet, grabbing a hoodie and putting it on. Jae then makes his way out of his room.

Sungjin and Wonpil’s eyes widen when they see Jae walk in and start to head towards the door.

“I’ll be back in about an hour,” Jae mumbles, slipping his shoes on.

“Where are you going?” Wonpil asks.

A sad smile makes its way onto Jae’s face, this shocking the couple on the couch, since they haven’t seen him smile in years.

“I’m going to go visit Brian,” he says.

The couple smile sadly back. “Alright, be careful, okay?” Sungjin says.

“Will do.” And with that, Jae walks out of the door.

~

Jae stares at the gravestone in front of him, the tears already streaming down his cheek.

_ Here lies Kang Younghyun. Born December 19th, 1993. Died October 22nd, 2016. _

“Hey, Bri,” he starts, putting his hands in his pockets, “I’m sorry I never came here sooner, like  _ way  _ sooner. It was just… way too hard for me to come here, honestly. I hope you understand that.” He sits down in front of the grave, crossing his legs. “It’s been… it’s been really hard without you, I-I miss you a lot… This is actually the first time I’ve been out of Sungjin and Wonpil’s place since your funeral, I didn’t really want to go outside much or do anything, actually.”

Jae stops talking for a bit, making sure he doesn’t cry more.

“I dreamt about that night, again. I haven’t for a long time, honestly, I thought that dream had stopped… but since it happened again, I felt like I should come and see you. I hope you don’t kick my ass for waiting for four years to do so,” he says, chuckling softly.

He looks away from the grave, biting down on his lip. “This… is really hard for me to do. I’ve honestly thought about joining you, a few times. I just.. I just can’t do that to Sungjin and Wonpil. I don’t want them to go through the same thing I did, you know? It hurt going through that and I still don’t understand  _ why  _ you did it Bri. Why did you leave me,  _ us _ ? We — we could have  _ helped  _ you, you know th-that.”

“I’ve felt like a damn  _ zombie _ for the past four years because you, you decided to,—” Jae cuts himself off with a sob. He stays there, for another few minutes, crying his eyes out.

After he calms himself down some, he straightens up to look at the gravestone again. “I’m probably going to go now,” he wipes away a few tears, “I’ll try to come back, I promise.” Jae gets up, looking at the gravesite one last time before leaving completely. He makes sure he doesn’t break that promise for years to come.


End file.
